This week has been a busy and quite an interesting week. It has certainly gone very quickly which is always a good sign. As I write this blog I realise it is probably late to be published. This is due to the tennis. Well the television schedule has been affected by the tennis so why not my blog.
At the start of the week I went to the Comedy Gala Night at my local theatre. Over the last few years Darlington has really become established on the comedy circuit and often attracts the big names in comedy just before the Edinburgh Festival. This July there is a whole month of comedy going on and started with a charity Gala night. The host for the evening was the brilliant (and quite cute) Chris Ramsey. He is certainly going to make it big very soon I feel. Other comedians on were Andrew Ryan, Dan Nightingale, Gary Delaney, Peter Firman, Dave Twentyman, Jason Cook and Duncan Oakley with the headliner Sarah Millican. It was a great night although a late one. We were a bit too close to the stage for my liking as well. We were in the second row of the stalls and every time the comedian looked in my direction I was worried. The last time I went to a comedy night I ended up on stage doing weird dancing, got hugged my Patrick Monahan and told a whole theatre audience I was gay, so I am sure you can understand my nervousness. Thankfully I wasn’t picked on and I had a great night. Laughter is the best cure for everything.
Ooooh the tennis has just started again after the rain so there is a delay to the advancement of the blog.
[1 hour and 21 minutes later….]
Oh well he did his best didn’t he. Anyway where was I, that’s right my blog. So yeah I had a nice start to the week which was good as I have been quite busy at work so it was good to relax a bit. Everyone thinks the summer is a quiet time for librarians oh no it is like Christmas for Santa’s’ elves we are busy working away ordering books for people to read. So far this week I have ordered books about gay cowboys, Edward II and a book addressing the big problem of ‘What will happen to International relations when there is a Zombie attack?’. Seriously this all true. When the book arrives I will have to remember to tell you what the answer is to the zombie question. I now also have the urge to watch Brokeback Mountain again (this is because of the gay cowboy books not the zombies), I will have to dig my DVD out and find the time to watch it.
On the subject of Brokeback Mountain this week it was World Pride Day and was held in London. I have never been to a Pride event and may go to the Newcastle one, I think it is quite soon. Because of this there has been a lot of talk in the press about being gay and coming out. One of these articles was on the BBC and was about coming out in the workplace . I am not going to say whether people should or not, that is a personal choice and depends on many circumstances. Last year when I came out I wrote about it on here after telling close friends and family. I knew by doing such a public gesture I was making an active decision to say to people who knew me including work colleagues that I was gay. I chose to do it because I knew I had great support from friends and family and that there were rumours amongst people that maybe I was gay so it was my way of staying in control of things by telling the facts. I don’t know for certain who knows at work, I haven’t asked people but I do know the blog I mentioned had a high ratings the following Monday so I’m guessing a lot of people were talking about it. However some people still surprise me. The other week someone said ‘well you will understand when you have children of your own’. Now I know being gay doesn’t mean I can’t have a family but it is less likely so this made me think that maybe that person didn’t know, or simply they forgot and then felt awkward afterwards either way it made me think for a moment. At the end of the day it doesn’t matter to me, I decided to be public about it because I want to be myself at work and outside of work. I am lucky I suppose that where I work has a fantastic LGBT network which is good to know as being the only gay in the office can be quite lonely. I don’t mind people I work with know I’m gay it just says I’m honest with people. That said though it is up to you as an individual to decide if it is right for you. The good thing though is that due to people coming out early in their lives (not latecomers like me in their 30’s) they are happy to be out in the workplace so it will just become the norm.
This has got me thinking about dating and meeting people because at work a few people were talking about dating and one person said ‘it must be tough meeting people nowadays’. First of all ouch! Yeah it is tough to meet someone but I don’t want reminding of it. It did however get us talking about how do you meet people. Now I know I am not an expert on this and the fact that I am single proves this, however there are ways to meet people I just need to put some of this theory I am going to mention into action.
1)A lot of people meet people at work. This is true and I know many people who have met the partner at work. As I have said “I am the only gay in the office’ so unlikely to happen for me at the moment but it could in the future you never know. After all I work in a library and a recent survey said you are 86% more attractive when you read in public. This might sound odd but if they are reading something you are interested in then you have something in common so may get on. It is well-known that bookshops are popular places to meet that someone special and the British Library has a very good reputation for this as well (honestly its true).
2) Shops are meant to be good as well, particularly supermarkets. Now I am unsure about this. Having worked in a supermarket I didn’t meet anyone although I did get told once by a colleague that a guy had said I was cute. This was before I was out and they told him I was straight. Knowing the supermarket it was probably for the best as I don’t want my bottom patted my just anyone. At least it wasn’t at a supermarket with the slogan ‘every little helps’ because that would make me sound like a charity case. I do know someone who did meet their other half in a supermarket I just don’t think it would work for me. Mainly because I am rubbish at flirting. I do try but it just hasn’t happened. Starbucks is quite good for flirting opportunities as gay guys do seem to prefer Starbucks for some reason. I haven’t noticed anyone trying to flirt with me in a shop although the nice guy in M&S does keep saying Hi (even if he see’s me out of the store. I know it’s clutching at straws.).
3) Other ways of meeting people are on a night out in a club/pub and online dating. It is true it is hard to meet someone on a night out in a club/pub. The chances are they are only wanting one thing but it is also still possible for relationships to happen. I know people who are very much in love who met on nights out. I have tried it and yes a little dutch courage does give you the confidence to actually ask but I still get turned down. There is nothing more annoying than getting turned down in a gay club by a guy by him saying he straight. No he is not he just doesn’t like you admit it.
4) So this brings me to online dating. A few years ago I was sceptical about it but I know lots of people who have met the love of their life with online dating and they are not weird they are genuine nice people. I have tried it as well and have met some great guys so it is possible and certainly not to be sneered at. Feel free to let me know how you met the love of your life and any tips you have for me.
I have also upgraded my phone this week. I have stayed faithful to Apple and have an iPhone 4S. It is lovely and I trying to get used to Siri. It is not a helpful as I thought. I had hoped it would be like one those magic balls where you ask a question and it would answer. Sadly not. Still it is early days. There is a big difference though between the 3Gs and the 4S. The pictures and text are much sharper and it is nicer to hold. Simple things make happy.
Anyway that is it for this week. Remember to let me know how you met your other half, did someone act as a matchmaker (if anyone wants to do that for me please feel free but the way). If I get enough suggestions I will try to do a top ten list of places on where to meet the love of your life.
I was right this blog is late. Sorry for that but I hope you have enjoyed it.
Top TV programme of the week : SMASH
Top song of the week: Pet Shop Boys – Winner
Book I am currently reading: Fifty Shades Of Grey by E.L James