Hi everyone and welcome to this weeks blog post. I am sorry it is later than normal. I think until the play is over it is likely to be on a  Monday when I do this. I haven’t given up on it I promise. This week I will be discussing summer reading, latest on my Dad, coping with stuff, Avenue Q and Jurassic World. This is a lot to get through so I had better get started as I am late enough already.

We are half way through June and I have realised I haven’t thought about my summer reading for this year. This is probably because a) the weather is not summer weather and b)I’m not reading much at the moment as I am just focussed on reading my lines for the play. However this isn’t an excuse to think about the books I want to read over the summer. The list is long and the titles that are so far near the top of the list are ‘Go Set A Watchman’, ‘Life After Life’, ‘The Girl on the Train’ and ‘The Buried Giant’. Have any of you read any of these books? (I know the Harper Lee book isn’t published yet but the rest are). Maybe you have suggestions of your own. If so please let me know in the comment section at the end of the blog and let me know what is on your summer reading list.

On Wednesday I went with my Dad to the hospital to see the specialist nurse and consultant. It is the first time my Dad has had the chance to see them and it was a big day for us as a family. I know it sounds silly but having the conversation with them made it even more real. I don’t know whether other people who go through similar things think this but part of you hopes it is a bad dream but then you know deep down it is not and that you just have to deal with it. Sat in the waiting room was quite a relaxing atmosphere and I didn’t expect that. I caught myself looking around at other people and thinking to myself they are all going through something just like we are. This really puts your life in to perspective when you see so many people who are battling on each day while dealing with the stress of illness. We still don’t know what treatment he is to have yet as he needs the results of another scan before they decide on that.

My Dad is doing amazingly well. Yes he has bad days where it gets too much for him but then we all do. The specialist nurse talked to us about this and I said we are just taking it one day at a time and trying to carry on as normal and she said thats the best thing we can do. I can’t get rid of his cancer but I can just carry on as normal as that is what he wants us to. I wish I could say I was coping well but I am struggling and I have to get better at coping as it is going to be a long journey and I can’t stumble over at this stage.

It has only been a month since he was diagnosed but it feels like months and months ago. I am struggling to hold everything together and I have got to put my life on hold for the moment. I don’t want to sound dramatic but my head has too much going on and I can’t focus on all aspects of my life at the moment and improve them so I have to prioritize and that means my plans of moving out, dating etc have to be put on hold. I knew this would be the case but even my Mam said although she wants me to move out she is glad I am still at home. I know she is right but at the same time I just wanted to cry and then felt bad because I was being selfish. I am busy at work and the play is taking a lot of my spare time on evening stand weekends so I feel as if I don’t really stop at the moment. Maybe that is a good thing as it keeps my mind off stuff. Last week there was a point where I just wanted to scream to let some of it out but I didn’t and I somehow got through the week. People have said to me not to worry so much or don’t get stressed and they mean well but saying this is the equivalent of saying don’t press that red button you end up doing it. Sorry for whingeing on but putting some of this into writing does help take some pressure off.

After going to the hospital on Wednesday I went to see Avenue Q at Darlington Civic Theatre. Avenue QI have seen the show before and have the soundtrack and love it so much and I knew it would be the perfect thing to see after an emotional day. The show works so well and it makes you look at your life and realise you have to make the most of things and that if you think you have some special thing to do in life then you are probably wrong. I think the song ‘For Now’ sums up my life at the moment and I have to make some compromises in life and that all this stress that we are going through as a family is only for now.

As well as all of this on Saturday I went to the cinema to see Jurassic World. I love the Jurassic Park franchise and the original is one of my all time favourite films (It has someone called Timmy in and Dinosaurs of course I like it). The second film was alright and I even liked the third film (actually I enjoyed it more than the second which is controversial I know). The trailer for Jurassic World looked great and what excited me was that the Park was finally open. Let’s be honest all fans of Jurassic Park wanted to see the park open as we secretly all hope it would come true. After seeing the film on Saturday I have to say there is a little bit of disappointment with me regarding the film. Visually the film is brilliant,  and I love all the homages to the original movie, and it ticks all the boxes regarding action. However my main criticisms are:

1)Wasted characters and lack of development – there is hardly any character development and this makes it hard to care for many of them. The film should have explained the children background more, the geeky IT guy should have had a bigger role and was wasted, the bad guys weren’t really bad and you never felt they were a threat.

2)Too much in the trailers – This is a common fault with many blockbuster films. Some of the most amazing scenes had been shown a year ago in trailers and would have been better to keep under wraps. The trailer didn’t need them. Just knowing the park was open was enough to get fans excited.

3)Not enough dinosaurs – I wanted more dinosaurs and by that I mean more real dinosaurs and not made up. Dinosaurs are awesome and we will never stop being scared of them or wanting to see them and the film I felt forgot this.

There are other complaints I have such as I felt the director was a massive Spielberg fan and wanted to make the movie into a big tribute to him instead of trying to be true to the original film. Next time Spielberg you have to direct it. Initially after seeing it I gave it 4/5 but 24 hours later I dropped that to 3.5/5. It is still a good film and worth seeing but t could have been a lot more and there are too many holes in it when you look closely.

Well that is it for this week. Sorry for the lateness but I am glad you have stuck with me and read this.

Speak again next weekend/Monday.

Top Programme of the Week – Stonemouth

Top Song of the Week – Muse – Dead Inside

Book I Am Currently Reading – Moon Over Soho by Ben Aaronovitch