Hi and welcome to this weeks blog post. This week I will be discussing childhood nostalgia, life balance, BBC Breakfast, and Eurovision. So let’s get started.

In last weeks blog I said I felt as if I was stuck on a computer game level and trying to find that special thing to progress to the next level. I am still feeling that way but there is so much else going on I am just focusing on getting to the end of the level and not really looking for that special item.

My life balance is not how it should be. Although work is busy it is fine, 3 evenings are taking up with rehearsals so I have 4 nights for myself and the whole of Saturday to myself. Doesn’t sound that bad when I put it like that but I feel as if I am just sleeping, waking, working, repeat and it is starting to get to me. I’m not doing anything for myself and I said at the start of the year I wouldn’t let that happen.

I think part of the problem is that I haven’t planned any time for myself. I have concerts, theatre trips, weekends away, holidays planned and it is now nearly March and my calendar is just filling up various commitments. The plays mean a weekend away is difficult until July. July to September is my busy period at work so this means the earliest I could consider having some time away is September /October. This is what I mean about my life balance it is all over the place. I will just have to go with it (reluctantly)for this year but next year it’s all my time.

Part of this frustration is down to me feeling as if I haven’t achieved much. I’m 35 and single and still at home. Friends have moved they are married, have children, a house, but as usual I realise I have been left behind and need to start catching up although I know some of these things will never happen.

Sorry to start this blog ‘glass half empty’ but I have struggled this last week and my defences have been down. The slightest thing could make me emotional and I had to fight back tears while reading my book on the train to work this week. Maybe it is the time of the year, lack of sleep, early mid-life crisis or something totally different. So for now it’s sleep, wake, work, repeat.

As well as feeling a bit emotional I have also been feeling nostalgic especially about my childhood. Like a lot of people I gave away many childhood items/toys/books and now I wish I had kept some of them. My long-term goal is to try to replace some of these things and I have already been searching e-bay for He-Man and Thundercats. What I have discovered though is that there is a collection ‘Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’ comics from the 90’s that have been collected and put into a collection of graphic novels. Now I am not usually a fan of the graphic novel genre and I suppose these are not true graphic novels but it was a joy to discover them and the illustrations and stories took me straight back. I look forward to rereading them. I have also discovered there is a series of He-Man graphic novels which I am also looking forward to starting. I am not sure what has started off all these feelings but I feel I need to listen a little bit to them.

I started this blog post talking about life balance and how I am falling into a routine. Now a very small part of that routine is starting the day with BBC Breakfast. This week-long standing presenter Bill Turnbull had his last show and it made me think about work and how in the end we will all have a last day. When I left ASDA many years ago I didn’t get upset but I think the library would be different as it means a lot to me. Hopefully my last day will be a long way off yet but we all will have that day at some point. Although I liked watching BBC Breakfast with Bill I know that I will just carry on as normal and that is what happens everything just keeps moving on.

Finally on Friday the UK picked this years entry for Eurovision. It is Joe & Jake with the song ‘You Are Not Alone’ which is about unity and love. It is an ok song but from the performance I saw it needs a lot of work to be contender. The message of the song is probably the biggest thing going for the song especially with the EU Referendum happening a month later. We will just have to see how we do.

Well that is it for this week. Sorry for the downbeat tone to the blog but I just needed to explain to myself and others how I was/am feeling. Right I’m off to sleep now. If you are staying up for the Oscars enjoy (secretly hoping Leonardo DiCaprio doesn’t get it).

Top Programme of the Week – Birds of a Feather

Top Song of the Week – Lukas Graham – 7 Years

Book I Am Currently Reading – Proud by Gareth Thomas

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